It was as if God wanted to play some sort of twisted, sick joke on me. I wanted to regurgitate the warm coffee I’d sipped on with Vic just an hour before, wanted to rip my hair from my scalp, wanted to scream. To cry.
I had no chance to further react to the horrifying revelation presented through neatly-printed ink on the slip of paper before me, however, for the sound of the door at the front of Liam’s apartment echoed between us. Heavy, steady footsteps followed the noise of the door closing and moments later, the Devil himself appeared across the room from his bewildered band mate and myself.
I’d expected Liam to bombard me with questions as to what his idiotic friend had done that had caused me to come crumbling in tears at his feet after my eyes had dried. I’d anticipated an onslaught of demands as to what Zayn had said, what Zayn had done, what had transpired. But they never came and he didn’t ask. After I mumbled a humiliated apology, wiping at my damp face with the back of my hand and avoiding looking at his moist t-shirt where my face had been pressed moments prior, he simply smiled, stood to his feet, and offered me a hand.
There was this one time, when I was about fourteen years old, that I’d thought that I’d truly been heartbroken. I’d been an awkward thing – even more so than now, with very little sense of any real self expression, but that was about the time I’d met and grown close to Duke. I was enamored with him – the flutters in my stomach wouldn’t subside when he was near, the aching in my chest worsened when he smiled, and a stupid grin was consistently plastered on my face in his presence. I’d liked him a lot, and he’d liked me too. Unfortunately, I was his buddy. His Sam banana. His friend. He usually joined me for lunch, but this particular time he was nowhere to be found. Only minutes later had he come strolling in, his arm wrapped affectionately around the waist of this pretty blonde girl with a large bust and a blindingly white smile. I was devastated. I couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep for nights on end; all because I was sure that I was suffering a slow and agonizing death. From a broken heart.
note: This is not a fanfic or one shot. This is just a little start of what can be a fanfic. I don’t have time to write the whole story so i just post the little things i have i mind. I really like this story idea but it not worked out good yet.
Aaron and Zayn won’t get allong great and stuff, the main character (girl) falls in love with Zayn but Zayn is aware of Aaron his protection over her. They have their ups and downs and she can’t decide wether to stay with Aaron (they aren’t together officially) or Zayn. In the end Zayn moves back to london and i want him to say something like ‘We always knew we weren’t made for each other. You might want to be with me, but we both know we are not going to end up with each other. It is just not meant to be.’
I am not going to write this so if you want to, just message me.
I swung my legs over the iron bar in front of the brick house. We always chilled on the roof of the old, empty house. I placed both my hands against the cold brick wall and slowly stood up, balancing on the iron bar. It was not easy to get up there but we had voted and decided not to put a ladder up. It will make people curious what is up there and they will find out about our place.
I took a deep breath and stretched out, my finger slipped over the edge of the house and I pinched my nails in the soft blanket behind the edge. I took another deep breath and jumped, pulling myself up on my own strength.
‘It is so funny to see you struggle to get up here’ Aaron laughed and rolled over the dirty, with blankets covered floor.
‘Thanks for helping me, dude’ I chuckled and dropped myself next to him on the couch. It was an old, worn-out, leather couch with some dirty pink pillows. It wasn’t any luxury we had here, it was just a place to clean up your thought or have talks with one of our friends. The only ones that knew about this place were me, Aaron, Lacey, Jack, Prince and Mimi.
‘Have you heard about that new dude?’ Aaron asked and blew smoke in my face. He opened his pockets and held his regular cigarettes in front of me. I shook my head and opened the little sides pockets of my leather jacket and took a package of minty cigarettes out. I swear I’m the only person in the world who smokes them.
‘What about him?’ I asked before lightening my cigarette and inhaling a mouthful of smoke. I blew out little circles of white, thick smoke and leaned back in the couch.
Aaron laughed, he always laughed. ‘He is from England.’ Aaron said the word England like it was some strange universe. A place where humans didn’t exist. Aaron was typical American, Mac Donalds was his second home, he watched football all the time and his old, vanished blue pick up truck was his baby.
‘He might be cool, we don’t know’ I said and flashed him a smile. I flipped my cigarette between my fingers and blew out little circles of smoke again. Aaron took a big drink of his almost finished bottle of beer and swung his feet over the edge of the couch we were sitting on. He kicked his shoes off and leaned his head on my lap.
I extinguished my cigarette and threw it off the house before I started to mess his hair up with both my hands. I drew little triangles on his head and tickled him softly.
‘But he is English.´ Aaron said and rolled his eyes when he spoke the world English. I laughed, Aaron was so typical. ‘He might have the same humor as Mr. fucking Bean’ Aaron spoke and let out a chuckle.
I copied his chuckle and we both busted out in laughter during the time. Aaron kept whispering ‘mister bean´ as soon as we stopped laughing, and it would make us laugh again.
Aaron lightened his second cigarette and went back to sit up straight. I heard a couple moans from the streets and stood up. I wasn’t like Aaron and watched one of my friends struggle to get up here. I peeked over the edge and saw Lacey and Mimi trying to get up. I tucked my feet under the couch and swung my upper body over the edge, stretching out my hands. They both took my hands thankfully before I pulled them up. Luckily they grabbed the edge really quick because if I had to pull a little bit longer, I would have slipped over the edge and fell off.
‘Hello my love birds’ Lacey said and wrapped me in her arms, embracing me for a hug. ‘Shut up’ I laughed and walked back to the couch. Mimi already took her cigarettes out and sat down on one of the big chairs in opposite of the couch. I sat back in my original position besides Aaron and Lacey sat down next to Mimi. Taking her cigarettes out too.
‘I’m cold’ I whispered and shoved closer to Aaron. Me and Aaron were really close, I’ve liked him for a while but we never happened. I don’t know about my feelings for him right now, he is a cool guy and I get along with him like a house on fire. Aaron took his black hoodie off and pulled it over my head, covering my tiny body. I lifted my feet up and shoved a little closer to Aaron and wrapped his arm over my shoulder. He smiled and pulled me on his lap. Kissing my cheek softly every now and then.
‘Have you heard about the new guy already?’
‘Yes. We have seen him, haven’t we’ Mimi said and slapped Lacey against her arm.
I immediately sat up straight, I was curious to find out more about him. ‘What is he like?’
‘He is - Mimi took a pause and looked at Lacey. Lacey grinned and nodded towards Mimi. – fucking hot!’ They both grinned and Lacey took her phone out. Punching the little black keys like her life depended on it.
‘Catch!’ she said and threw her blackberry, covered in a pink bumper, towards me. I reached out my left hand and caught the little black phone. I narrowed my eyes and checked the picture out. I didn’t even knew human could look like that. He was gorgeous. Big hazel eyes with thick, curled lashes. His hair was sculpted in quiff and a naughty smirk was tugged on his face. He wasn’t looking towards the camera, he looked to some thing in the distance and it seemed like he was having a conversation. His hands hung loosely next to his body, his thumb tucked in his pocket.
‘How did you get this pi-
Mimi and Lacey started laughing. Lacey stood up and took her phone back. ‘We could be paparazzi, just saying.’ They smirked and Lacey lightened a cigarette. My clothes smelled like smoke so bad, I hope my mum doesn’t notice when I come home.
‘Can we talk about something else than hot guys? I feel uncomfortable.’ Aaron said and wrapped his arms around me tighter. ‘Kiss me’ he whispered and stoke my jaw line with his finger.
I turned around and smiled. ‘Why?’
‘Because I want to- Aaron his gaze lowered to my lips and when a little smirk was tugged on mine, another appeared on his. – and you know I love you.’
‘I know’ I grinned and intertwined my fingers with his. Aaron moved a little closer and pressed a little innocent kiss on my lips. I quickly pulled away and grinned. He had to work a little harder to kiss me. At least, that is what I was trying..
Aaron cupped my face in his hands and crashed his lips on mine. His lips tasted like peppermint and smoke, like always.
I growled and hid my face under my pillow. 7.00 am was not a time you should be getting up. It should be time you go to bed, in my life it is.
I threw my duvet off my body and left it as a tangled mess on the edge of my bed. I shove my feet in a pair of slippers and yawned. I should have left way earlier yesterday, but me and Aaron were having a good time. A little smile appeared on my face when I though about him. Aaron was the best.
‘Sweetie, you need to hurry up or you’ll be late again!’ Mum called from downstairs. I growled again and walked to my mirror. I looked like pile of dog shit. Seriously, I had some work to do.
I quickly put my hair up in a messy bun and rubbed the leftovers of yesterdays mascara off my face. I took clothes from yesterday off, I wasn’t bothered to change last night, and changed into a pair of dark red high waist shorts and a black cropped top. I washed my face and dried it with the ends of my shirt. It was hot outside so my shirt is going to be dry before I arrive at school anyways.
I quickly applied a thin coat of mascara and a small layer of baby pink lipgloss. I never really took time to dress up, I liked dressing down more. I applied a little bit of my favorite parfum and put my cross-ring on before checking myself out in the mirror again. I looked… okay.
I kicked my slippers off and shove my feet in a pair of vans before taking a bite of the captain crunch my mum had made me.
‘Mum please bring me to school, I’ve missed the bus already!’ I shouted and licked my lips. Captain crunch was the best.
‘Yes darling I’ll. Hurry up, I’ll be in the car.’
I quickly grabbed my vintage backpack in the hallway and checked if I had everything I needed. I had my cigarettes, a pen that worked, some books, my phone, gum and a bottle of vitamin water. I was ready to go.
‘I think I know what Santa is giving to you this year’ My mum said and speeded up. I raised my eyebrow, where the fuck was she talking about?
‘A working alarm clock silly’ she chuckled and placed her hand on my knee. I rolled my eyes and sighed. My mum was so not funny.
‘I’ll see you tonight. I will be home after dinner so don’t bother to make yourself some decent food’ she said and kissed my forehead before pulling off and racing to her work.
‘HE IS NOT EVEN HERE’ Mimi shouted and jumped on my back. I shook her off and looked around. There was no clue of the new boy and it seemed like the whole school was waiting for him to arrive. ‘He will be here later today, I actually know him’ Jack said, who bumped into us a second ago.
Me and Mimi both looked at him like he was from a different universe. ‘You know him?’ we said in common and started laughing.
‘Yes I do, I’ve been on a holiday in England once and I have met him there. He told me he was moving to the same neighborhood as me. You are going to love him. He is really funny and I think he fits in our group perfectly!’
‘He won’t because he is English.’ Aaron swung his arm around my shoulder and gave me a wink.
‘He is half Pakistani and half English to be precise. Why wouldn’t he fit our group?’ Jack asked surprised.
Aaron laughed. His loud, manly laughter filled the schoolyard and within seconds I was laughing with him. There was nothing to laugh about, the sound he was making just made me laugh. ‘He is fucking Pakistani and English and you think he fits in our group?’ Aaron asked surprised and rolled his eyes. ‘No way’ he mumbled. ‘Come one’ Aaron grabbed my hand and dragged me away from our friends.
‘You think he doesn’t fit in our group either right?’ Aaron asked and pulled my on his lap.
‘I don’t know, I haven’t met him yet but according to Jack he sounds like a really nice du-
Aaron cut me off. ‘He doesn’t fit our group. Trust me baby. I’m the eldest.’
‘Like that’s a reason to block people out who are friends with a friend of yours? Just because he comes from England?’ I rolled my eyes when I spoke the word England out and stood up from his lap. Aaron was a dick, sometimes.
I opened my bag and switched my books. I had chemistry and a free period. I was the only one of our group that had a free period today so that meant I would probably smoke about 3 to 4 cigarettes in one hour, alone.
‘What was that about?’ Jack placed his hand on my shoulder and turned me around. I closed my locker and sighed.
‘I don’t know, Aaron is being a dick. I wasn’t laughing about that Zayn guy, Aarons laugh is just funny’ I mumbled and swung my backpack over my shoulders. You didn’t want to have a argument with Jack, he was the ‘boss’ of our group. I remember joining Jack, Mimi and Lacey three years ago. About two months later, Prince joined us and the last one that completed our group was Aaron. It didn’t felt like that though, Aaron had fitted in quicker than Prince.
‘I know, Mimi told me you think he is hot’ Jack chuckled and raised his eyebrows.
‘I’m just saying..- he rolled his eyes - Zayn is arriving today by the way, if you see him can you please send him my way? I haven’t seen him yet and I miss my buddy’ Jack grinned and gave me a peck on my cheek. Jack was my big brother, he always protected me and helped me making the right choices. Not always though. Jack also is the one that got me smoking, drinking and sneaking out the house at night but I don’t blame him. I’m thankful because without him I would still be the same loser I was a couple years ago.
My chemistry class was over before I had opened my books. I wasn’t a ‘good student’ but I do get good grades. I just don’t like paying attention to those bitches who call themselves ‘teachers.’
I dropped my books in my locker and took my cigarettes out. I had my free period and I needed a smoke.
I sat down at one of the brick walls in our schoolyard. It was nothing special, really. Just some threes and brick walls to sit on. We used to have wooden benches but people wrote discriminating stuff on them so they got removed and replaced for brick walls. I crossed my legs and got my iPod out my bag. I played my favorite song and opened the little square box of cigarettes. I took one out and placed it between my lips. I took my lighter between both of my hands, protecting the little flame from the wind that was blowing pretty hard. After a little struggle with the wind my cigarette was lighted and I could finally smoke. I took a long drag and blew the thick white smoke out in little white circles. I closed my eyes en enjoyed the moment.
‘Do you have a lighter for me?’ a deep, soft, male voice interrupted my moment of joy. I opened my left eye first and was about to close it again. When my brain finally worked and I recognized the Asian beauty I flashed my eyes open and jumped on the ground.
‘Yes I do. You are Zayn right?’ I said and couldn’t help but smile.
‘Uhh- Zayn looked embarrassed, he had never seen me. I’m so stupid, I sounded like a creepy stalker. – yeah..’
‘I’m a good friend of Jack. He told me to send you his way. Come on’ I said happily and dragged him towards the school gates by his arm.
‘Calm down. I want to smoke first’ he chuckled and sat down on the brick wall I sat on earlier. He held out his hand and pointed at my pink lighter. I threw it towards him and watched him lightening his cigarette. I immediately recognized that smell. Minty cigarettes.
‘You smoke the same as me?’ I asked surprised and held my package of malboro in his face. He didn’t gave me an answer, he just nodded and took a long drag of his cigarette. I sighed and sat down next to him. Maybe Aaron was right. Maybe he wouldn’t fit in our group.
I was disappointed with myself when a surge of anticipation shot through me the next morning upon hearing a rapid knock at our front door. When I’d shakily made my way to the door, passing a suspiciously bubbly Leoni in the kitchen on the way, I mentally scolded myself for the thought that it could be Zayn. I was even more frustrated that I couldn’t deny that I wanted it to be him. Regardless, I remained composed and squinted into the peep hole, my breath catching in my lungs in preparation to see the head of dark hair confined by a knit cap. Instead of the smoldering brown gaze, however, I was met with the impatient cobalt gaze of my best friend.